oh god the rape fog is back!
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
