I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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