Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
