people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She bit a glass in half.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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