i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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