I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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