break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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