Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
