It's Friday. Sex?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
