plz talk dirty to me
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
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