I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize