The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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