..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
