My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
