I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
