Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
be right there i have to get my cape
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
