allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
