your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
