Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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