Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
