If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
