I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
