why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Randomize