He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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