Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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