New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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