So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
