Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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