my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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