Don't you send me to vm
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
