so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
