Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
