therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
