it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
