I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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