This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
