Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
