I just made out with a guy for $7.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
