Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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