I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize
