just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
