Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize