You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
