FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
