Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Randomize
