I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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