Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
