She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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