i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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