ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
